Its been about two weeks since i landed here. And i thought I should be generous and hand over some of the gyan I've acquired since:-)
1)If you want to get rich, get into the tissue paper and paper cups business. Or maybe the dustbin one.
2) If there is anyone else within 2 feet of you, say 'excuse me' . If you don't, you will be assaulted with 'excuse me' s.
3) While standing in queues, avoid using the technique you use in the mumbai locals trains. People are civilized here, when in queues.
4)If you are going to crack a joke, make sure you have a deadpan look on your face. Else no one will understand it .
5) Don't forget to register for some of the more interesting courses - handbag etiquette, 'cry it out' technique for babies, and 'bone booth' counselling for dogs.
6) If you want to make a profit on the tissue paper business, spend a long time drafting a disclaimer. Try and make it as inscrutable, and ambiguous as possible. For this, engage the services of a lawyer, an etymologist, and an idiot. Lawyer will come up with the rules, the etymologist will phrase them, and the idiot will find the loopholes. Acquire this skill. It is transferable worldwide, and has no expiry date.
Disclaimer :- Since I claim to use the knowledge I have acquired, it is only appropriate that I include a disclaimer. This disclaimer covers all of this post including the disclaimer. If thats a paradox, its because its supposed to be inscrutable:)
6 comments:
Excuse me..am lost with deadpan..do you mean they're so quick on the uptake or so..umm..subtly minded? :)Tissue paper is true here also. no tissues equals national disaster. but neat set of rules. ya we figured all of it would be inscrutable..;)
Hahahaha! the usual Karthik post! And Karthik, I completely agree about the tissue and disclaimer part! Very well written, crisp and funny, as usual! :D
The best part I liked is ''People are civilized here, when in queues.''
Wonderful gyan!
LoL! The 'idiot' has propelled this post to the top of the 'Best of Karthik' collection.
Btw, where are you and what are you doing there?
thanks for the comments everyone :
deadpan - that was a crytpic one. Will explain once i figure out myself :-)
Thanks Aditya. I'll mail you.
Like this post. Made me smile. :)
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