Saturday, September 28, 2024

updates on sleeping better

 After my sleep related experiments, I can now confidently attest to the fact that keeping the phone out of the bedroom is an excellent idea. 


I also discovered one very important principle to making this rule work - Resist the temptation to make "reasonable" exceptions to the rule :D The moment you allow the phone in for a day, for what seems like a very valid reason, it will soon make persistent and persuasive efforts to become a permanent resident in the bedroom. 


I have also got myself  a pair of genuine blue-light blocking glasses. More on that later ! 

Wednesday, July 17, 2024

Sleeping better

One of the topics I am really interested in these days is sleep. On days when I don't sleep well, I realize I am just waiting for the day to somehow be done with. To cut a long story short, I'm 100% convinced that optimizing sleep is an extremely important part of living the good life, and sleep, in general, to a great degree influences our life experience. 

Anyhow, I have recently developed a tendency of opening youtube before going to bed - which leads to me spending 30 minutes browsing random youtube videos. I also realize that overcoming this tendency isn't going to be easy, but it's essential so that I can wake up a tad fresher the next morning. 

So far, I've been telling myself that I need the phone near me as I sleep, to set the alarm for me to wake up to, in the morning. And just a couple of days ago, I came up with this brilliantly simple idea - Of getting myself a small alarm clock. My brain briefly considered the idea of buying 2 alarm clocks - When one of them runs out of battery after 276 days, the other one would wake me up that morning ... lol :) 

I proposed this idea to my wife, and she immediately gifted me an alarm clock.... 

So, here's my plan 
  • At 9 pm everyday , my wife asks me for my phone. and I hand it over, and she leaves it somewhere in the hall
  • My phone is henceforth banned from entering my bedroom. 
  • I use the alarm clock to wake me up. 


I trust this will work well and help me sleep better.  Will report back in a few weeks :D 


That which you are dependent on, controls you.  


Tuesday, July 16, 2024

The key to constant improvement

 One secret to moving from good to very good to excellent is to constantly overcome the blur-effect. 


Take the example of vocabulary/language - When we get to the point of being "good enough", we become content with understanding what a certain beautiful sentence is saying. We fail to notice the phrasing or the specific word that accentuates its beauty. The whole sentence is "blurred" down to its essence. 

To improve your language/vocabulary, observe the sentence in high-definition. Resist the urge to allow the blur effect to kick in. To be able to notice and marvel at the next level of detailing and nuance is the  key to never ending improvement. 


The ability to resist the blur-effect at the 'sentence-level' and apply it at the 'article-level' sharpens the capacity to seamlessly shift between the big-picture and the details. 

A Random thought

 If you are patient with a bully, you are not really patient. You are just a coward. 

Tuesday, July 09, 2024

A Random thought

 There are 3 levels of expansion


1) Expansion of knowledge 

      2) Expansion of understanding 

 3) Expansion of sensibilities 



The real magic happens in Level 3 

Friday, July 05, 2024

Monday, July 01, 2024

Why self help doesn’t help

 We read inspirational books. Some books give such a high, such deep insights, and open up a world of possibilities, that we believe we are going to be forever altered, and that our life is finally going to change. A few days later, the inspiration has died down, and out life is back to normal. The older normal before we read the book, that is. 


We attend seminars. Seminars that promise to transform us. That promise to equip us with tools that will dramatically accelerate our pursuit of our ideal life. The trainers speak with such power and charisma that we believe that this is the training that will finally fix us. And a few days after the training, our life is back to normal. The older normal, that is .. 

So why don’t the books and trainings that offer so much promise change us? Why don’t the life-changing insights change our lives ? Why is it that our repeated efforts fall flat ? Why is that despite our best intentions and determination, our life doesn’t really change?

I can relate to this personally, because I read book after book, attended numerous seminars and put in a lot of effort, and yet, my life wasn’t changing the way I expected it to. 


And finally, I understood why these inspirational books and seminars weren’t changing my life. While there are many reasons, I am going to touch upon 3 key reasons : 

1) Imagine you learn Robotics, super computing and artificial intelligence. You spend an entire semester mastering these topics, and you are raring to apply the concepts you have a learnt. Unfortunately though, by a quirk of fate, you find yourself transported by an evil-time machine into the ice-age.  Now, living in the ice age isn’t quite conducive for practicing super-computing and artificial intelligence. 

The problem is that most of us learn life-changing ideas, and then find ourselves swimming upstream as we attempt to internalize and apply them in our lives. 

Which brings us the key point – When you learn life-changing ideas, you must also place yourself in a world which has a place for those life-changing ideas, and encourages you to practice those ideas. This translates to two things – the environment that surrounds you, and the people you surround yourself with.  Did you read a book on dieting, and yet junk food is placed in an open location at home? If so, your environment is competing ( as opposed to collaborating) with your learnings and intentions. 


Do you read about the power of positive speech, and then spend most of your time with people who complain or gossip a lot. Over time, their combined effort will conquer your determination to speak positively. 


Once you learn a great idea that you wish to bring into your life, you also need to reflect on what existing parts of your life resist that idea. 


Environment always beats will-power. 


2) The second biggest reason why people give up on their goals is this – They are not accountable to anyone as they pursue their goal. There is no ‘consequence’ for not staying disciplined. 

Humans, by default crave the path of least resistance. We start out doing the hard stuff, with all our will –power and determination, but once we find a roadblock or have an off-day, we easily get off the routine, and soon, staying out of routine becomes a habit. 

The way to fix this is by accountability. Tell people close to you about the goal you are pursuing. You can ask one of them to keep you accountable. Better yet, find another person who is pursuing a goal similar to yours and you can keep each other accountable. You could call/message each other daily/on –a-weekly-basis to share your progress, and to keep each other going. 


3) Reward yourself when you demonstrate an act of change –If exercising is your goal, please don’t reward yourself with a cheese-cake for getting your workout done😊  (Maybe you could sign up for a spa session once you workout 5 days in a row). Rewards create a positive association to the desired change. You have put in the effort. Reward yourself regularly for the effort you are putting in, while ensuring that the reward does not oppose the original goal  

Most self-help books are written with best intentions. But they don’t change our lives, because we first need to learn what makes behavioral change happen, before we can change our lives. In this post, I shared three of the most powerful ideas that will enable us to dramatically raise our chances of us actually changing.  Creating an environment that is conducive to change,  being around people who are supportive of this change, and rewarding ourselves for demonstrating commitment to change.  

These are simple and effective strategies that have helped me. Apply them and you will get better at getting better. 


Sunday, June 23, 2024

A Musical Piece - When you say Nothing at all

 I wanted to record something for the World Music Day  , and I picked a song I have long admired - "When you say nothing at all". This is one of those songs which is very pleasant on the ear. and also musically rich. I think of all of the recordings I have posted on youtube , this is the one that has come out the best.  If only, I had fixed the EQ on the higher octaves to be a bit better... Next time :D 


If you want to listen to it, you can find it here